• Overcoming Comparison As A Style Blogger

    how to overcome comparison as a style blogger

    Every woman knows “the little voice”. That negative devil on your shoulder, telling you mean things about yourself. Mine often sounds like, “Me… A curvy girl… a plus size role model…Who do I think I am? I’m trying to compete with these other style mavens.” Or it says, “Those girls rock the Chanel, the Gucci, the $900 dresses and get campaigns with stores and brands I could only dream of. Who do I think I am?! I’m not as tall as them, as thin as them. So why do I even bother?”

    But the best thing to do is shut down that negative self talk. I always combat “that little voice” by reminding myself that I’m the everyday woman. Because – when you see me, you will see your best friend, your sister, your mother. When you get to know me, you will find a woman that struggles with confidence just like every other woman. You’ll find a woman that pokes at her lumps and scars and says to herself “don’t eat this or that because… (fill in the negative/fat shaming words you think because I’ve said them all). It’s a daily struggle. Really more of a lifetime struggle. I’ve never been a size 2. Add a 1 in front of that number and that’s the smallest I’ve been my entire adult life. I mean, once I was a size 10 for about a year, but I felt like I had to KILL myself at the gym – working out like an addict and eating barely anything. Ultimately, I learned my body wasn’t built to be that size. My body can’t maintain that size. It’s not in my DNA to be a size 10. I’m more comfortable a size or two bigger. I used to think maybe a 12 was achievable but now that I struggle with an autoimmune disease called hypothyroidism, that doesn’t seem like a reality anymore.

    So where does a curvy girl go from here? How can you break up with “that little voice”. You must learn NOT to compare yourself, think what makes YOU happy. You must learn that beauty comes in every size, and YOU are beautiful. You must remember that the struggle is something we all have in common, whether it is losing 10 pounds or trying to gain 5 pounds. And maybe even blame a little on your genetics! (Let’s be real, that is the root of it all) When you can understand these things and start to embrace your body with all your flaws, it becomes easier to overcome that pit in your stomach that says you’re not good enough. And trust me, I know that feeling all too well. Even as an influencer and style blogger, I catch myself starting to compare.

    I want to thank you all for supporting me. I really love being a blogger and influencer because I want to inspire ALL women to find confidence and beauty in themselves; because beauty comes in all shapes, sizes and complexions. We are all so unique! So embrace that! Just imagine, for one minute, just how boring the world would be if we were all the same. Ewwww. The horror!!!!

    There is a confident goddess inside all of us. Does she come to the surface all the time or everyday? Hell no. BUT, if we understand our worth and we try to relate to different people, then I’ll tell you…it makes what we do as style bloggers that much more rewarding. The countless messages of love, adoration and appreciation for what I do as a curvy style blogger makes my heart melt. I never knew the power I had to make another woman look in the mirror and say “I’m beautiful the way I am”. So women and style bloggers alike, appreciate your individuality and know that you are not alone. Whether you blog to inspire petite women, or curvy women, or the women who are a size 2, you are appreciated more than you know. So as I say all the time…do you boo. Do you!

    lifestyle blogger sandra downie talks about how to overcome comparison as a lifestyle blogger

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    14 Comments

    1. Sue
      February 14, 2018 / 2:46 pm

      So lovely what you said. 😊. And you do help me remind myself to no be so hard on myself. So I thank you for that! You are a beautiful soul inside and out!

      • therusticlife
        Author
        February 15, 2018 / 2:19 pm

        Awww Sue, thank you. I want to feel like what I am doing/saying helps others somehow/someway. You are the sweetest!

    2. Diane
      February 15, 2018 / 1:26 pm

      I am not sure how I found your blog, but I just love it. I love your fashion and decorating style. Keep being you — you are beautiful.
      I really like the trench coat — I would like to order but checking sizing. I am normally a large or size 12. What size would you recommend?

      • therusticlife
        Author
        February 15, 2018 / 2:19 pm

        Hi Diane, thank you so much for saying hi and I’m so happy and appreciative of you being here 🙂 As for the jacket I would recommend you get Medium as it is roomy XO

    3. Jackie Murphy
      February 16, 2018 / 3:04 am

      Great post.

      • therusticlife
        Author
        February 16, 2018 / 10:29 am

        Thank you Jackie!

    4. Erin
      February 20, 2018 / 2:27 pm

      Thank you for this post. I feel like I am constantly in this cycle of dieting, gaining weight back, then beating myself up for it. My new goal is to be ok and happy about who i really am and what I look like. It’s helpful to know that other people struggle with this.

      • therusticlife
        Author
        February 23, 2018 / 9:57 am

        Erin, it’s such a struggle for most women, especially in this digital age. It sounds like you are on the right track to success. Self love is a constant journey. Never give up. XO

    5. March 22, 2018 / 6:45 pm

      Thank you! Feeling the blogging comparison game hard lately!

      • therusticlife
        Author
        March 24, 2018 / 11:27 am

        It’s so hard not to, so I get it. Just keep doing you, people love YOU and that is all that matters!

    6. Jacqueline Thompson
      April 3, 2018 / 10:30 pm

      Oh my gosh this is the first time I’ve read your blog and I freeking LOVE YOU!! I’m 54 and when I hit 50 my body wants to be 2 sizes bigger unless I starve myself in spinach and asparagus. I’m also a foodie here in Southern California. I live at the beach and my family surfs so it’s intense pressure for the bathing suits! Even at 54!!! God I’m so exhausted and you just made me feel like a million dollars girlfriend! Thank you Lord for this gal!

      • therusticlife
        Author
        April 4, 2018 / 10:23 am

        Jacqueline, as women we often times need to feel like we are not alone with how we are feeling. The inner struggles we have and face. It can be overwhelming. I’m so happy this post helped you to feel better. XO

    7. August 21, 2018 / 2:00 pm

      I so needed to hear these words today! All of it rings so true. Thank you for continuing to be you and showing the rest of the world what REAL WOMEN look like! You are an inspiration.

      • therusticlife
        Author
        August 22, 2018 / 11:00 pm

        Awww Jennifer, you are so sweet. I’m so happy that you could find support and inspiration in this post. That was certainly my hope for it.